Long time, again...

 172 weeks since last update it says. probably.

Been going through old files... looking at stuff like MUX chat logs from 2002 makes me kind of sad and nostalgic. Old times... miss it.

If anyone from the old SluggyMUX days sees this, email me: Would like to just get in touch again, really.

Part of me wants to take up the things I used to do again... another part of me is still working on divesting myself of commitments and time-killers.

Haven't decided what I'm doing: settling in, or moving on. Or going back, if the feelings I get reading this stuff is any clue.

Feel like I haven't gotten anywhere further along my path since 2004 or so. Did get quite a ways politically... yet now I've resigned nearly all my posts because I couldn't handle the time pressures of being in charge on top of work.

Not good at leading people. There's that certain quality real leaders have that makes people just follow... I have the opposite. Almost Cassandra-like ability to state what needs to be done, and be completely ignored... people just don't listen to me. Think I'm finally starting to accept that, but it's not easy.

Some days, wish I could commit to writing all this out, but a decade of experience (merciful chaos, I feel old) tells me I can't keep an update schedule. write, work, stop... never start again. Frustrating.

Sigh. There was a path in front of me, 2003ish. I knew it, felt it,  hemmed and hawed, and it was gone. Have never felt that sort of draw, fate I guess, ever again, when it used to be so strong, all the time. Find myself ignoring more and more of the random feelings that I don't have explanations for. Being so focused on the material- job, money, all that. I miss that feeling of something more.

Guess I've just got to seek it back out...


Well, that makes 22. I wish I could say I really made use of 21... ah well.

Since I forgot to mention it then, I'll note that since August 31, I'm the Associate Chair of the Senate District 40 DFL, and a member of the DFL State Central Committee. Which is especially nice, as the area of SD40 includes both the part of Bloomington where I lived until a couple years ago, as well as the part of Burnsville where I live now.

I'll write more later, maybe.

Jazz Fest

Today was the "Arts & All That Jazz Festival" here. The Nicollet Commons Park where it is is a really, really nice venue. It was just built last year (shortly after I moved here). Same place where MoveOn had a candlelight vigil in support of Cindy Sheehan earlier this week, too- at least today it was really nice weather and didn't rain... I was helping with a section that benefits the Community Action Council (a local nonprofit, does a lot of good work), mostly packing up everything at the end. Life lesson, folks: art can be heavy and large, and artists may have small cars. Tetris ensues. Anyway, good music there... Nick Colionne was the headliner, did a great set.

So now I'm tired and sore from (A) lifting and carrying stuff for artists and (B) sitting on the ground for a couple hours listening to music. Yet of course, as always, I can't sleep. Hence the puttering about on the net.

Maybe I'll have something more interesting to say tomorrow...
  • Current Music
    Squeak E. Clean feat. Karen O - Hello Tomorrow (original)

Update Time

Been a long time since I've posted anything here - 16 months, it would seem. Kind of embarrassing, really. But it's about time I wrote some things down... I'll get around to it soonish.

Recap: I did not go to Idaho. I became involved with Democratic Party politics, virtually every campaign that was happening, and many similarly-aligned organizations.

None of the 6 or so candidates I volunteered for won their races. In all of 2004 and 2005, I've had paying employment for all of 3 months out of that time (Jan-Mar 2005).

Many, many other things occurred, few of them worth mentioning.

In other words, a whole hell of a lot happened, but very little changed.

So I guess I'm going to try some new approaches. Let's see if I get anywhere.
  • Current Music
    Noir - Yuki Kajiura - Salva Nos II